Looking after your family

Nothing can play more havoc with your nerves than having morning sickness and having to take care of your children at the same time, particularly if your children are under 5. Following are some suggestions for you so that you may better cope with the stresses that may arise from looking after your little ones while you are pregnant and have to deal with morning sickness.

I understand some of the solutions may not fit into your personal circumstances but they are worth considering.

Hire help – If you have money in your budget go for it. It will definitely be money that is well spent! This will give you enough free time so that you may be able to concentrate on yourself until you feel better.

When you are feeling good, you can better look after your children. You will not have to worry about mopping that dirty kitchen floor and doing the laundry.

There are a number of agencies you can find in order to get extra help. Just make certain the person you hire has good references. You may also want to ask other mothers who they recommend if they have used home help before. You may even think about joining a mother support group. They will probably have an abundance of contacts to give you.

If you cannot afford help it might be worth lowering your standards for a few weeks until you feel better. Just carry out the essential tasks. You can get on with 'spring cleaning' when you feel better. When I was pregnant with Ben I desperately wanted to plant out my vegetable plants that I had sown - I just could not face it without feeling nausous and needing to deep breath and listehn to Morning Well while sucking a ginger preggie pop! I gave up, we bought veggies that year.

Get partner to help- It will be a big weight off your shoulders if you can get your partner to help a little more with chilcare task. If driving makes your nausea worse, perhaps you could ask your partner or neighbor to do the school runs for you. You must keep the communication lines open in order to maintain understanding in your relationship. Divvy up the tasks with your partner so that you may each take turn feeding your toddlers or babies during the day or at night. Try and delegate the tasks that you find difficult to cope with - smelly nappies and food preparation for example. I didn't change a nappy for weeks when I was pregnant with Molly. I also asked my partner to take Ben to bed because the milky smell on my toddlers breath would see me urging.

Above all else, be flexible. You must find out what works for you particularly when you are down and out with nausea.

Home based business/work from home – If you are a full time mother and work a full time job as well, perhaps you may entertain the thought of a home based business. This way you can be working at home and spend more time with your children.

With the existence of the Internet, there are a variety of opportunities available. Spend some time with your partner in studying and researching a suitable home business. Many mothers have found ways to turn their passion into a money making business. If you had always had a bit of that entrepreneurial spirit, now is the time to make those dreams happen! Indeed the birth of Ben saw me launch my internet career. There are lots of pitfalls to be aware of. You can read more about working from home here.

On the other hand, if you really love or need your job, perhaps you could speak with your employer about working some of the time from your home. In this way, you will have more time to rest and care for your children. You are able to control your environment when you work at home. You do not have to put up with those terrible food odors at break time anymore. You can start to eliminate things at home that trigger your morning sickness. You cannot do this at the office.

Depending on your job you might be able to negotiate working from home. Your employer might also consider allowing you flexi time to work around your 'worst' time of day.

Involve your children – If your children are older, you could have them look after their younger siblings for a time. If you feel too nauseous to do some of the household chores, get a list together and pass out chores for your children to do. You will be amazed to see what they are actually capable of doing. Be imaginative in thinking of different ways to involve your children. This will not only spell R-E-L-I-E-F for you, but it will help your children to feel more responsible. This helps to build a strong parent/child bond.

Get help from family members – If possible, call on the assistance of family members. You can even let you in-laws take part in helping out with your little ones particularly if you are having a hard time getting a handle on your morning sickness. If it is so bad that it immobilizes you, stay at your parents' house for a brief time or another understanding relative, if this is possible. You just may need to take a time out and go out for a while with a good friend. All of this can make a world of difference in your situation. My mother in law came to stay with us and basically ran the house for me. This caused its own complications but I doubt we would have coped without her.